That kain hunger…
That catches you on a Sunday morning
That you are powerless against
That makes you remember your Maker
That makes you pray angrily
That makes you pray aggressively!
Yes! Na that kain hunger catch me that Sunday.
That kain hunger…
That makes you set an alarm to when the church service will end
That makes you check your time every 10 minutes even during prayer sessions
That makes the funny pastor’s jokes as dry as plantain chips suddenly
That makes your weak laughter suddenly turn to dry tears
That makes you abscond immediately after church service
That no longer makes you a church worker – so no after-service meetings for you
Yes! The punishment for my sins that Sunday was hunger!
That kain hunger…
That makes you race out of the church into the pouring rain
That blinds you and almost brings you to your knees
That makes a light breeze almost sweep you off your feet as you race home – on foot!
That makes you greet the neighbourhood mallam with a squeaky voice
That makes you buy a dozen eggs – instead of half as much
That makes you pound your house’s gate like a tiger is at your heels
That makes your “Good afternoon, dad” sound like a growl.
Oh boy! The hunger that catch me that Sunday no get equal.
That kain hunger…
That makes me a Masterchef in moments
That makes me prepare noodles, fried eggs, toast and soak garri in less than 30 minutes
That belittles 6 packs of Indomie noodles to a mere 6 “okeles” of amala in your tummy
That makes your tummy worms dance “alingo” as food makes contact with your intestines
That makes Coca Cola bubbles sound like a Terry G symphony in your belly
That makes you wolf down a meal for four adult men in 10 minutes
And when you are done and you stare at your empty plate,
You hear an echo from your innards – the worms, saying; “E neva do o!”
That makes you feel your belly with your hands – to feel for space wey still dey there
And suddenly you makes you a pessimist – you now see your belly as half-empty
Yeeepa! This hunger get Part 2! *sets kettle to boil water for Eba!*
